Tuesday, 15 September 2009

I'm not quite sure how it happened. Somehow it went from vague promises of: 'Daisy, if you don't get fat immediately we're going to lock you up in some remote clinic for damaged teenagers.' Then, yesterday I was ambushed. I believe it was my family's imitation of an intervention. Apparently I'm off the rails. Crazed. Pyschotic. Pathologically fucked up.
Sex. Drugs. Lies.

And only last - anorexia.

But what if i'm not ill? What if this is me?

They're so ashamed and they want me to feel it too - the humiliation of being a fuck up from a 'loving family' with an 'excellent education' and everything i've ever wanted. I know why they're doing this and it's not because suddenly they've noticed i've lost 12kgs in 2 months and i'm drunk most of the time. Pasco wrote beautifully about reaching the very bottom and I think I've finally found it. The Beautiful One called me to tearfully admit to sleeping with the User, a few hours after a text from Long Term Crush came through saying we couldn't hang out anymore as he was trying to work things out with Big Tits Blonde. I think I passed out in the bath, my mum came in and pulled me out before I choked on my own vomit. It was the first time she'd seen me really naked, not just physically but as I am. Fucked up and sad.


  1. Family never understand do they?
    it sucks.
    Stay strong xx

  2. I'm sorry to hear about your family. If they're trying to understand you, they have to understand that these things are not Bad Choices you're making - they're biological.

    You don't deserve to feel ashamed. If they really want to help you, they need to know that.

  3. I agree. family don't get it.
    I hope you feel better soon.

  4. interventions are awful... ive never heard of any kind of good intervention...